


Zenith Eve

by steelneena



Series: CR 2 Oneshots and Short Series [26]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: - no seriously, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Body Worship, But they don't know that, Fucking, Gentle, Light Dom/sub, Love Confessions, M/M, Manhandling, Mutual Pining, Pining, Praise Kink, Ritual Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Size Difference, Tender - Freeform, Whatever the new ship will be called, Wildemom approves of her boys fucking, love is kink, so tender -, soooooo romanitc, xenodick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:20:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25634956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/steelneena/pseuds/steelneena
Summary: Fjord is new still, to his place in the Wildemother's worship. But Caduceus is always there to guide him. When Caduceus asks him to participate in the celebration of the first official evening of summer, how can he possibly refuse?Only, it entails something rather more involved than a prayer and some incense. Something Fjord never anticipated.But he's an adult. It's not that big of a deal. After all, what's a little ritual sex between friends?
Relationships: Caduceus Clay/Fjord
Series: CR 2 Oneshots and Short Series [26]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1280990
Comments: 21
Kudos: 291





	Zenith Eve

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SebGrayCro](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=SebGrayCro).



> For SebGrayCro, who asked, courtesy of the WM discord, for ritual sex, body worship, and gentle fucking for Fjorclay. Thanks for the prompt! I had a blast. 
> 
> Written to a selection of Loreena McKennit, because she just has that soft sexy mood. idk
> 
> Kinda proofed, but not really. Probably has some mistakes in it somewhere.

The moment Fjord had elected to take last watch, Caduceus had nearly managed to casually volunteer to stay up with him. Nearly, because Caduceus wasn't usually that quick on the uptake; they'd all been together long enough for Fjord to be well familiar with his propensity for lackadaisical response.

But not that night.

As a result, his sleep had been poorer than usual before Beau woke him. She's immediately gone down to the crew quarters to collapse in her own hammock, leaving him to his thoughts. Decidedly less captainly than usual.

The decks were empty of crew when Fjord departed his cabin. A shadow drifted gossamer by the moon, unveiling it in all its glory as he looked out over the now occasionally sparkling majesty of the ocean, calm, though not full doldrums. Only gentle waves lulled against the hull, sloshing and splashing.

"Beautiful, isn't it? Kinda mysterious though."

Despite his efforts, Fjord could not stifle the slight jolt of his muscles as Caduceus came up silently behind him.

"Yes. It is certainly that." Awkwardly, Fjord coughed. Caduceus, as always, proceeded seemingly ignorant of the tension, and sidled forward to lean against the railing beside him.

"I tended to forget that this is Hers, too. Before you found Her, of course," he continued, staring out at the vast expanse. Fjord absently nodded his commiseration, despite the fact that Caduceus wasn't actually looking at him and therefore, wouldn't have known he'd done it. Mentally, he pressed his palm over his face. Idiot.

"It's kind of frightening, actually, the more I'm on it. The more I experience it. The ocean. I'm thankful, you know, for all the gifts She's given me, but uh," Caduceus chuckled, passing a hand through the gently drifting strands on his hair. "Well, I'm definitely a little disproportionately thankful for my control over the water."

At that, Fjord cracked a smile. "I agree with you completely. Very helpful, that."

"It's Zenith today." There was something in Caduceus hands, a braided rope of some dried grasses or another, which he fiddled with over the edge of the ship. Fjord stared a little, curious. Not mesmerized. Just...curious. "Not an official holy day, or anything, but it's special all the same. And well, I thought I might do a little something to thank Her. And if, uh...if you're interested, that I'd ask you to...participate."

First came the surprise. Then the small thrill of pride. And then, well...'Tension' had never been a word Fjord thought would describe an interaction between anyone who wasn't actively trying to kill them, and Caduceus. And yet, it was present. Thick and cloying like the incense he so often used in his rituals. The weight of expectation, perhaps, was a better way to term it. Caduceus' expectation: that he wanted Fjord to join in. That he found Fjord worthy. And his own expectation: his uncertainty of what such a ritual required. If he could rise to the occasion.

"You don't have to, of course." Only when Caduceus spoke again did Fjord realized just exactly how long he'd been contemplatively silent. "And only if you're interested."

"I don't want to mess anything up," Fjord rushed out. "I - Learning more about- about our Mother is something in which I am deeply, sincerely interested. But there's so much I don't know yet, and I'm honoured that you'd ask. Deeply, really, and-"

One large, gentle hand clasped over his forearm. "Fjord." Rambling. He'd been rambling. Not suave at all, man. Come on now. "I'd like it very much if you'd help." Caduceus was looking at him then, holding his gaze deep and long and steady, like the unwavering horizon. Like the True North in a velvet black sky. "I'm the one honoured to have your assistance. But before you go agreeing to anything, maybe I'd better explain first."

The fact that Fjord nearly told Caduceus that he needn't bother, was probably a great indicator that he should have simply turned around and walked straight back into his cabin and never left. But he managed to keep the façade. Disguising a deep breath as a gruff cough, Fjord set his jaw and nodded. "Of course. Makes sense."

Caduceus gave a mirrored nod. "What do you know about Zenith?"

"Well, in the astronomical sense, I know that it began and ended at noon with the sun directly overhead. And I know that Traveler Con was supposed to be today, but well..."

With an amused huff, Caduceus' eyes shut briefly, and Fjord noticed his eyelashes shadowing his cheeks, long and dark.

"Yes, that's definitely something. Well, for the Wildemother, this is important because it's officially summer. And every new season is cause for celebration for her. She is all seasons, after all, and no single one is any more or less important than another. Birth. Life. Death. Decay. Over and over again."

"Got it. Beginning of summer. Big happy celebration. And how do we big happy celebrate?"

Something came over Caduceus then, just enough for Fjord to notice. Tense, nervous, like before.

"Well, it's a ritual...I suppose it's kind of a celebration. The celebration of birth is actually a Spring thing, and I didn't really do that either." Caduceus' hand came to his head once more, running long fingers through his tresses. It was a mesmerizing ripple, like waves on water. "But summer is also a celebration of life, which is a little different."

Feigning patience, Fjord waited, biting the insides of his cheeks to make it work.

"There are a couple of ways to celebrate life, but the usual ways aren't open to me right now. Usually there's ground and vegetation. Well..." Caduceus gestured around them.

"Right." Fjord's mind immediately set to visualizing the geography of the region. "Do you need me to adjust course? I'd need to check a map to see...Not entirely sure we'd make land in time before the Zenith is over."

"That's real nice of you, but no, that's not necessary." Fondly, he shook his head, and smiled, just a little. "There are other ways to celebrate life. Actually, what we're about to do, that is, if you're willing, is actually one of the most common. I've never actually done it this way before."

Finally, Fjord recognized what it was. Bashfulness. Narrowing his eyes, Fjord could almost see a blush on Caduceus' moonbeam kissed cheeks. There was silence, longer than was comfortable, while Fjord attempted to make sense of bashfulness on Caduceus. Which was, fair to say, probably one of the last expressions of undignified emotion he'd anticipated from the generally unabashed and stoic firbolg.

The nerves moved up into Fjord's chest. "What does it require?"

"Two people. At the mercy of Her grandness, vulnerable in an act that is evocative of pure vitality."

Fjord gave Caduceus a blank stare, and though their eyes never met, Caduceus must have understood that clarification was required. The barest pause followed before he finished.

"In general, sex, of some kind."

It was as though Fjord suddenly lost the capacity to breath air. Lungs stalled, blinking rapidly, he stared at Caduceus, who stared back at him, flush gone, only patient expectation left.

"Sex."

"Yes."

"You want-"

"Yes."

"Wi-with me?"

"Yes. If you're interested."

"To honour the Wildemother? You want to have sex with me...to honour the Wildemother."

Slightly, Caduceus cocked his head, and the stare became a seeing, something deeper, something more.

"Is that so hard to believe?"

Fjord swallowed hard, but it didn't stop his voice from cracking, high and sharp. "Yes?"

"Even if you weren't Her child, Fjord, I wouldn't ask anyone else but you." The earnestness in Caduceus' voice was strangely embarrassing, and Fjord felt his face heat. "I believe that you're the right person to do this with me, but I won't be offended if you're not interested. And if I've made you uncomfortable-"

"No. No, I'm not...uncomfortable. Just. Surprised." He swallowed again. "And...flattered."

"It's alright to say no. Fjord, no matter what the reason. You don't have to tell me."

Fjord leaned back over the railing, looking out at the silvered gilt of the moon on the waves. And wasn't that just the thing? Caduceus was always so-so accommodating. He could back out. Caduceus would smile, and repeat his 'no hard feelings' spiel, and then Fjord would continue his watch while Caduceus would go... _somewhere_ and do... _things_. By himself.

And then Fjord would inevitably spend the entire watch thinking about how he wasn't _somewhere_. Doing _things_. With Caduceus.

"Well." On anyone else, it would have sounded like impatient. On Caduceus, it sounded merely conversational. "I guess I'm going to head out then. I'll see you in the morning?"

"Oh, what?" Fjord blinked again, turning back to Caduceus. "Um. Yes. I guess."

"Yeah, silly, I suppose. We're on a ship. Of course we'll see one another in the morning. Where else would we be? Unless you sleep past noon, in which case it wouldn't really be morning anymore, would it?"

"No, Caduceus." He braced a hand out in front of him, leaving it hovering in the air between them. "No, I don't mean 'no'. I mean...yes. Yes. I accept your...proposition."

"Oh." Caduceus' eyes widened, his whole head moving with the word. "Well, in that case, uh, at first I thought I might go up in the crow's nest, but with the two of us, I'd rather not risk the fall. But we're got to be out in the open."

"Right." That time, Fjord managed to swallow the pitchiness he'd anticipated. "At Her mercy and vulnerable means outside. Got it. Under the moon, eh?"

"Yeah, that's exactly it."

"Well, there's the balcony behind my cabin. Would that suffice? Vulnerable to Her doesn't have to mean vulnerable to _other people_ does it?"

A patient smile crossed Caduceus' features. "Don't worry Fjord. I'll take care of you."

How easily Caduceus' simple, unassuming ways overwhelmed him. How few words needed pass his lips to bring Fjord's breath to a standstill, and in a tone that carried no seduction and no heat, no less.

A slender hand, soft and warm, took his, the one he'd left up in the air in futile effort to stall Caduceus' exit. The one he'd forgotten about completely. "Shall we?"

"Yes." He reconfirmed, more for his own sake than Caduceus'. "Yes."

Everything was heightened as Caduceus led Fjord to his own cabin, which should have been odd, but wasn't. Very suddenly, Fjord was highly aware of the whole of his surroundings. The creaking of the ropes, the buffeting of wind, the slosh of the waves. Luckily enough, they'd moored, because the wind was so low. It wasn't as though they were in any particular hurry to get anywhere, so it seemed fine to stall out for the evening. And now, that move was curiously convenient.

It was good that Caduceus was leading him, as Fjord nearly stumbled through the doorway, caught totally unawares of their arrival. If he noticed it, Caduceus made no indication, still gently leading Fjord through the room toward the door that opened out onto the aft balcony.

"I have to set things up. There's a little more to this to make it special for the ritual. You know."

No, he didn't know, but Fjord nodded anyways.

"Is there anything I can do?"

"In time," was the cryptic answer. Caduceus opened one of the windows, latching it back securely, and pulled a small clay...bowl? Something, from his satchel, which he sat down on the sill, followed by a stick of incense upon which he struck a flame before waving it out. Then, he laid it in the bowl, making sure it was secure and wouldn't jostle.

A heady aroma wafted out from the cabin, engulfing them both, musky, unnamable, but something very distinct that Fjord was sure he would forever associate with Caduceus.

"There. All set. You ready?"

Fjord opened his mouth, thinking to say "as I'll ever be", but stopped and simply focused on breathing for a moment, on the perfume of the air, of Caduceus' silhouette in the dark, of the gentle rocking of the ship. "Yes. I'm ready."

It wan't exactly news that Caduceus was tall - and Fjord himself wasn't precisely short, not by the estimation of most - but as he stepped nearer, Fjord realized just how much. His sightline was even with Caduceus' collarbone. It was a humbling realization.

"I'm going to undress you."

Slowly, Fjord nodded. He could feel Caduceus watching him, looking down, but he stared straight ahead.

For the barest moment, Caduceus' hesitated as he reached towards Fjord, but it was passed in a blink, leaving Fjord wondering if it had really happened at all.

Nimbly, Caduceus started undoing the silver buckle which held together the cloak at Fjord's shoulder. The movements were slow, purposeful, and when it was finally undone, Caduceus simply let it go, allowing it to fall silently to the ground, the cloth cushioning the thunk of metal.

The armor was next. Undaunted by the complexity, or perhaps simply familiar by virtue of their longstanding habit as roommates, Caduceus didn't need to pause or assess where to begin. Chestplate and pauldron both were removed and more carefully set aside than the cloak had been. The string of the capelet pulled and let free. It fluttered to the ground. At his waist, the belt, buckle undone, dropped with a click. Gingerly, he moved on to the buckles that held together the asymmetrical cote at the chest.

There was something unbelievably intimate about the whole process. So tender. So unlike anything Fjord had experienced before. How ironic, that this was for a ritual, and yet held more reverence than any supposed tousle of love had been in the past.

The cote followed everything else to the ground, and then the shirt beneath it, leaving his chest bare to the cool wind and Caduceus' soft touch. Ghostingly light, Caduceus' fingertips trailed down Fjord's chest to his abdomen, then lower, to the ties on his trousers.

Unintentionally, his muscles flexed, and his breaths deepened and held. Caduceus' hands hovered centimeters away, waiting patiently. Only when Fjord released the tension, released the breath, did he continue.

The ties loosed, but there, Caduceus stopped, hands migrating to Fjord's forearms. Walking him in a circle, so that their positions were switched, Caduceus finally spoke again.

"Lay down."

Despite the imperative directed at him, Caduceus' tentative grip on Fjord did not lessen and they both knelt first, before Caduceus laid him back on the planks. The urge to close his eyes was present, but he resisted, staring up at the unveiled moon. Was she watching them yet? Or did Caduceus need to say a prayer or something to get her attention? Did it even work like that?

But before he could over complicate the consideration, there was a touch on his calf, and he tilted his head, looking down his own body at where Caduceus knelt, meticulously removing first his left boot, and then his right.

Caduceus leaned back, sitting on his heels. The loss of the contact - which had been so alarming at first, electrifying - was agonizing, and Fjord tried not to think about why.

It was easy enough to distract himself, watching Caduceus pull his own gossamer shirt over his head. Only then did Fjord realize that Caduceus had been without his armor, or his cloak the entire time. Already anticipating that they'd end up here? Hoping that Fjord would agree?

 _No_ , he recalled. Caduceus had been prepared for Fjord to say no. Either way, Caduceus would have stripped naked beneath the moon that night.

This wasn't especially for Fjord.

It was for Melora. It was for their goddess, in honour of summer.

That, and nothing more.

"Mother."

The evocation of her affectionate title in Caduceus' most reverent tones reverberated deeply in the night. Fjord could not suppress his shiver. And though he was cold, his nipples hardened in the night's breeze, warmth coiled in his abdomen.

"Summer is a time of bursting life, of flourishing and vitality. You've helped us out a lot lately, and we wanted to pay you special thanks, and honour for your place in our lives. Thank you, for your guidance and protection."

He glanced to Fjord, a query in his eyes.

Clearing his throat, Fjord wracked his brain for something eloquent to add.

"You came to me in my lowest moments, and you offered me sanctuary. And your own loyal servant, Caduceus, has continued to aide me in this new path, in this new journey. I am grateful a-and joyful for this chance. Thank you for offering me your sanctuary, and your blessing."

With an approving smile, Caduceus continued. "Accept this offering we make together, one made in thankfulness and joy, in celebration of all the life that you oversee and allow to flourish on its natural road."

Abruptly, the wind turned warm and gentle, and Fjord had the eerie notion that there were eyes on him now, aside from Caduceus', a tender gaze, appreciative and pleased.

Once more, the slight pressure of Caduceus' touch returned to Fjord's calves, sliding up to his thighs. Again, his breath hitched, but in nervous excitement this time.

"Hips."

Readily, he complied, and Caduceus slid Fjord's trousers and smallclothes simultaneously down his legs and off, discarding them in the rest of the pile.

Usually, stripping happened in rather less than a minute or two. There was no ceremony, no special attention to it. Getting naked had always been the primary goal. But Caduceus seemed in no hurry to bare himself the way he'd bared Fjord.

No, Caduceus was most certainly far more preoccupied with staring down at Fjord than anything else.

The excitement dampened under the scrutiny, but Fjord couldn't drag his own gaze away from Caduceus' face, his expression transforming into one of awe, of wonderment. Fjord's hot blush spread down his neck to his chest as Caduceus knelt over his thighs, their skin touching finally and again, pooling heat.

When he leaned forward, the moon encircled his head like a silver halo.

What breath Fjord had left escaped.

"Whatever I do, however I touch you, if you don't like it, or find it uncomfortable, you tell me."

It was all he could do to nod.

"Say it, please."

"I will tell you to stop if something isn't comfortable or to my liking."

"Good." Caduceus pressed his palm flat over Fjord sternum. His hair hung so long and low, it tickled at Fjord's shoulder. "I'm going to kiss you now."

Blood pounded in Fjord's ears.

"Everywhere."

Petals would not have been softer. The first kiss landed right above the hand on his chest, and trailed up, tracing the line of his sternum to the base of his throat.

"You are beautiful, out here like this," Caduceus whispered, breath hot and ticklish against Fjord's skin. "Summer is full of beauty. Flush with life, and virility. So are you."

The words were too much to contemplate. Hands. What to do with his hands? Where to - Hands in his hands, fingers laced, shifting up beside his head. Caduceus' body above him, lanky, but graceful, undulating as the kisses continued. Along his neck, up his jaw, towards his ear.

"Your pulse. Close your eyes and listen for it. Feel it. Life. Life at work within you. Bodies are miracles. Your body is miraculous. Your breathe, and think, and feel. Breathe the incense and the salt in the air. Think about where you are, what you're doing. Feel my hands in yours. The heat of my body, mingling with the heat of yours. My lips." Another kiss, just beside his ear.

Low and raspy, Caduceus' voice was its own caress. Fjord tried and failed to focus on any one thing, save that.

"Close your eyes."

Reluctantly, Fjord did as he was told, and was rewarded by a soft kiss first over one eye, and then the other. "Thank you," the voice was at his other ear, juxtaposed with a kiss. "For sharing this with me." Back down in reverse mirror, kisses down the other side of his jaw, down to the base of his neck, back down the line of the sternum.

Nervous, Fjord reflexively tightened his grip on Caduceus' hands.

A low chuckle filled the night and Fjord shuddered. "I won't let go just yet. I promise."

"Good." He didn't recognize his own voice, breathless and raspy. Deeper than usual. Even he couldn't ignore the wanting in his tone.

True to his word, Caduceus kept their hands clasped, simply shifting back as necessary, first kissing one last time over his heart before taking a nipple gently between his lips.

Surprised, Fjord bucked up, what little he could, considering their position, but Caduceus did not relent. The sensations were so minute, and yet - somehow - so, so much more than he could handle.

When Caduceus left off, he blew gently. "Eager, aren't we?" When Fjord blushed, though, Caduceus sat up. "Don't hold back, Fjord," he said, seriously. "There's no judgement. Let Her hear you, let your feelings show." One hand loosened from his grip, much to Fjord's chagrin, but then it reached out, pressing into his hair, thumb rubbing gently at his temple. And when Fjord opened his eyes, Caduceus was looking down fervently at him. "You're beautiful. You're one of her most beautiful creations, and all ways you express your pleasure are also beautiful. All of nature is, you, me, all of us. Even the dark depths of the sea. Terrible and great and beautiful. Let yourself be as you're meant to be." His hand slid down to Fjord's cheek, caressing there gently. "There's no hiding, here, Fjord. And no reason to do it."

The words washed over him. If there was anyone in the world he'd believe them from, it was Caduceus. Caduceus who was always in earnest. Caduceus who always said things he meant, and meant things he said.

Fjord nodded decisively, leaning into the touch. "I don't want to hide."

"Good. Are you comfortable?"

Somehow, Fjord didn't think Caduceus meant to ask about whether or not the deck had any slivers, which, thankfully, it didn't.

"Yes." He let the desire flood his voice openly, unabashedly, and it felt good. It felt honest, and real.

Powerful.

"Please, don't stop."

"I won't." And Caduceus leaned in the rest of the way and captured Fjord's mouth in a kiss.

The desire to wrap Caduceus into his embrace was strong. A natural thought. So Fjord did, letting Caduceus' other hand go free as he skated his palms over the planes of thin shoulders, pulling Caduceus down further and deepening the kiss into something more deeply passionate than before.

When they broke for air, Caduceus pressed his cheek to Fjord's and chuckled. "Seems like you got the hang of it."

"Mmm." The sound came out more self-satisfied than simply pleased. "Maybe. Could still make do with some pointers though. You do make an excellent guide." For the first time, the confidence he felt did not belong to the guise of someone else, the words coming forward with ease. "There's none I'd rather have either."

Caduceus' eyes widened briefly, and a smile brightened his features. "Then I guess I'd better get back to it."

That time, when Fjord felt the wet heat of Caduceus' mouth over his nipple, he didn't suppress his reaction. The ghosting tickle of fingers trailing down to grip his hips stole his attention away. Caduceus' fingers spread an impressive span. Vaguely, a memory surfaced, though hazy, of being lifted, carried, by those hands. Safe and secure, stronger than they seemed. Healing hands, trustworthy and familiar.

A grip that could manhandle him about, if it's owner wanted to. Could spread him out, or lift him up, or set him down over lean, sinewy thighs...

A puff of breath preceded the gentle nudge of a nose below his belly button, lips pressing just below at the dip of his stomach.

So close.

Hair drifted over Fjord's growing erection, and unforgivable, blessed tease, and Caduceus sat up once more, grip flexing on Fjord's hip deliciously. He hissed at the pressure, shutting his eyes again. But only for a moment, because Caduceus was sitting up, and that meant, Fjord could see him again, no longer backlight by the moon, but illuminated by it.

"I can feel your strength, you know." Caduceus' voice was husky, and for the first time that evening, he seemed less focused on the ritual and more on the physical, staring down. He traced a hand over Fjord's abs. "Your muscles, tensing, flexing, reacting." And down over his hip, back to his thigh. "I like it. It's nice."

The words, more than the touch brought out the shudder.

"I like your hands!" Fjord blurted. "They're large. And gentle. Strong and nimble. They're opposites. Or something. I-" Caduceus squeezed Fjord thigh, fingertips scant centimeters from his groin.

" _Fuck_!"

A mischievous half grin grew across Caduceus' lips. "The more I squeeze, the more you flex. That's nice, too."

"Oh _fuck_." The insinuation - and all the blood in his body - rushed south. " _Fuck_."

Innocently, expression unaffected and tone completely unaltered, as though he might have been discussing the weather, Caduceus looked Fjord in the eye. "Ask nicely."

"Oh _fuck! Fuck, please! Please!"_

Without warning, though it wasn't fast or harsh, Caduceus rested his palm over Fjord's cock, and he gasped, head wrenching back.

"I'll have to stand up for a minute. That okay?"

Furiously, Fjord nodded. Even though he was loathe to lose the connection, it was better sooner than later.

"I'll be right back." As if to punctate, Fjord felt the sinful heaven of soft friction, the side of Caduceus' thumb rubbing over his length, however briefly. All too soon, he was left without any contact at all. But he watched, happily - practically salivating - as he caught glimpse of Caduceus' cock as it was freed from his own trousers, which fell about his ankles to reveal long, pale legs.

"There's a number of things we can do, but I'd like you to tell me what you want, Fjord," Caduceus was saying as he shucked his pants. "This doesn't have to be, uh, traditional? The way you might think. All that's necessary here is release, and pleasure. You control this, Fjord."

At some point, he'd been sure that he'd have the pleasure of Caduceus' mouth on him, but that hadn't quite come to fruition and there were other options, and combinations thereof that could be attempted. But as nice as an image as it was, view curtained by long pink hair, cheeks and tongue searing hot over his length, all Fjord could think about were Caduceus' fingers, sinking deep inside him, or Caduceus hands spreading his legs wide or lifting his hips, or lifting him.

Bodily.

And setting him down on a very particularly long and ridged and beautifully flush part of Caduceus' anatomy.

"I want you to fuck me," Fjord said again, but Caduceus shook his head.

"Tell me how."

Attempting to steady his breathing was a more difficult prospect than usual, but Fjord managed it. "I want to feel you. Inside me."

A soft look overcame Caduceus, who nodded, and reached for his satchel. "Of course, Fjord." There was a slight hesitation as he turned his attention to searching within the bag, before pulling out a little green glass jar, which gleamed in the moonlight. "You'll have to be patient if this is what you want. Can you be patient?"

Fjord gaze flickered back to Caduceus, taking him in, all of him, from head to toe, naked for all the world to see, and for all the lingering glances elsewhere, Fjord's gaze came to rest on the kindness within Caduceus' eyes, staring expectantly back.

He could wait forever, if it meant Caduceus would smile at him one last time.

"I can be patient."

"Alright then." Once more, Caduceus knelt, but this time, just like Fjord had imagined – No. _Better_. _Infinitely better._ \- after Caduceus carefully set down the little jar, his hands found wrapped around Fjord's calves lifting gently and pulling them apart. Simultaneously, Caduceus manouvered himself, settling himself in the vee they made. "Let me know if that's too far, too much of a strain." Fjord shook his head, and Caduceus gave a bare nod of acknowledgement before continuing. "I'm going to lift you a bit, don't want you scraping on the wood here. That alright?"

More than. Another emphatic nod, and Caduceus was gripping his thighs, tilting Fjord's hips enough that Caduceus could move in further, close enough to settle Fjord's ass down on the roundness of his knees. With natural motion, his legs tipped back too.

A little frown marred Caduceus' face. "Are you comfortable?"

"More so than it must look," Fjord rushed out, but added a solemn "yes," for good measure when Caduceus' frown deepened.

"If you're sure," he replied, lifting the little bottle tentatively. "This is about pleasure. There shouldn't be any pain."

"No pain, but I certainly won't mind a pleasant ache to remind me of all this in the morning."

If he didn't, Fjord wasn't entirely sure he'd believe it hadn't all been a dream.

"That's terribly flattering, thank you. But I won't let you forget."

There was an extra weight to the statement after Rumblecusp, after everything they had been through there. It meant more than he could put into words, or organize into thoughts at that moment. But he trusted Caduceus implicitly, like he hadn't trusted in a long, long time. Perhaps ever.

The train of his thoughts derailed as Caduceus smoothed his warm palm up the back of Fjord's thigh. "I'll take it slow."

Why keep his thoughts to himself? Caduceus had been reassuring him the whole time, but he was meant to be open, wasn't he? And he was more than vulnerable. Physically. Emotionally.

"I trust you, Caduceus."

_I love you, Caduceus._

"I'm glad." Caduceus' eyes shone with the sincerity of his emotion. "I'm honoured. Thank you for this. Really."

The warmth of the air curled around Fjord encouragingly, urging him on, but the words wouldn't pass his lips.

"You don't have to thank me, Caduceus. I want to be here. There's nowhere I'd rather be."

_You're holding back. Don't hold back._

The smile wasn't forced but, it wasn't wholly sincere, and Fjord only hoped that Caduceus wouldn't notice in the dark as they were.

"But I would _greatly_ , appreciate it if you could-"

"You said you trust me, Fjord." Caduceus flexed his grip and slid his hands back again. "So trust me."

Though he couldn't see it, Fjord could hear Caduceus remove the stopper from the bottle, and the friction of his hands rubbing together to warm the oil, before he felt the first brush of a finger against him.

"Relax for me. Nice and easy. That's it."

If he hadn't been so preoccupied by the pressed of a finger against his hole, Fjord might have considered how odd he found Caduceus' propensity for talking through sex. But as it was, all Fjord could think about was how long Caduceus' finger was, and how nice it felt, that pressure, and how gentle was the hand holding him securely in his precarious position.

"You tell me when you think you're ready for more. Can you do that?"

"Yes. it came out more a hiss than a word, but it was enough for Caduceus, who casually began to stroke him, inside an out, like something delicate. It utterly belayed the strength he'd so praised before, but it felt nice, the feeling coiling warm in Fjord's heart as Caduceus took care of him.

"You look incredible like this, Fjord." Huskey and deeper than ever before, Caduceus' low tone prickled like a gentle along the back of Fjord's neck. "I knew you'd look good like this, but you're beautiful. So beautiful, Fjord."

The instinct to bite down hard on his own lip was impossible to ignore, and he shifted his hips just a bit in protest of the aching, tender pace.

"Relax," Caduceus repeated. "Let me do this for you."

The wind, in coordination, soothed at him, kissing his cheeks, and he let the tension fall away, let Caduceus set the pace, allowing the hand on his thigh and the wood against his back to ground him in the moment. And when he relaxed, he found he could listen. All the sounds of the world were heightened once more, and he catalogued them readily, setting each aside, allowing them to rescind into a humming drone beneath the sensations within and around him. Finally, his focus came to settle on Caduceus. How he glowed in the moonlight, how the stars caught and sparked in his eyes at the right angle. How the look of concentration as he worked Fjord open drew two think lines down his forehead, and the corners of his lips twitched.

Impossibly endearing.

Fjord's heart ached.

Say it. Say it now or say it never.

But even as he opened his mouth to speak, Caduceus, still focused on the disappearance of his own finger within Fjord's body, unknowingly cut him off. "How are you feeling? Ready for another?"

Slowly, Fjord loosed the breath and forced the tension to dissipate again, hearing the phantom command to relax in Caduceus' warm tone.

"Yes. Please."

The greater pressure was the perfect distraction from his foiled confession; though the stretch did burn a little, it was not, indeed, painful at all. At first, Caduceus simply repeated the earlier motions, stroke at him rhythmically, but then he lifted the hand that had steadfastly remained on Fjord's thigh, moving it instead to loosely grip his cock, and thumb at the head. As sensitive as desperate as he was, the welcome touch almost accomplished it's presumed goal, but Fjord still noticed the sharper burn as Caduceus scissored his long fingers apart for the first time. Unwilling to contain himself, Fjord left out a moan, clawing his fingers at the planks beneath him in futile search for purchase.

"Shhh." Caduceus' hand on his cock alternated pressure and friction, but the fingers in Fjord's ass remained as meticulously paced as ever. "It's alright. I've got you. I've got you, Fjord. You're alright."

But Fjord wanted to touch, too, and his hand shot out for something, anything, finding only empty air. The noise that left him was enough to draw Caduceus' focus apparently, though not his concentration. Without even the slightest hesitation, Fjord felt the softness of hair against his fingers, and the warm press of cheek as Caduceus leaned into his touch.

"You're doing so well," he continued. "Really, really, well, Fjord. You're relaxing so good for me. Is it nice? Are you feeling-"

"Fucking heavenly." Fjord cut him off. "Incredible. You're perfect, 'Deuces. Perfect."

The stretch ceased to burn, instead baring the hallmarks of massage, pressure and pleasure, though it was obvious that Caduceus' goals were purely accommodating in the moment, and Fjord's rational mind poked through, grateful that his partner in this was so obliging, especially considering the girth, not to mention length, of his cock. Not that he'd anticipated any less from Caduceus. It was so like him, to take all things into consideration, to do nothing halfway, but only as the task was meant to be done.

Breaking away his gaze from Caduceus' face where it rest against his hand, Fjord lifted his head just enough to look up the slope of his body where Caduceus' hands worked him so purposefully and tenderly. It was the most erotically sensual thing Fjord had ever seen, but his neck couldn't take it and he let his head fall back with a thump, the memory seared into his brain more assuredly than any in a long, long time.

"Another. Please. I'm ready."

Caduceus followed through, and Fjord's eyes widened as he tensed the slightest bit. Though long and nimble, the description 'slender' could only be applied relatively to the size of Caduceus' fingers, which was to say, slender, perhaps, for a firbolg, but not for a half-orc. Again, as if to offset and dull the burn, the attention to his cock increased and Fjord relaxed once more, which eased the addition. But the initial jolt was enough to sink the fingers within him just a little deeper, and when Caduceus stretched them apart, they brushed up teasingly on that impossibly sensitive spot. As Fjord writhed at the sudden and rather unexpected stimulation, panting, Caduceus turned in head inward towards Fjord's palm and snuck a kiss there, murmuring inaudibly against his skin between further kisses for a while until all the sensations evened out once more.Top of Form

It took less time to get used to the third finger than it had the first two. Fjord rubbed Caduceus cheek slightly. "Please. I'm ready now."

"You're sure?"

"Yes. Please, Caduceus." Where before he'd sounded as needy as he felt, his voice was steady, assured, unwavering. "I want you, now." The urgency was gone, but the desire stronger than ever.

"Alright." His fingers began to withdraw, and he let off of Fjord's cock. "Do your best to keep relaxed, okay?" he asked.

Instead of answering, Fjord (whose hand had fallen away when Caduceus sat back and now lay limp on the ground beside him where he was so artfully splayed at Caduceus' whim, and wasn't _that_ a thought. What must he look like, chest heaving, muscles fighting to contract, lips parted...), focused on keeping his energy channeling down and through his limbs where it could dissipate. "Will you- I mean, I'd like it if you- if I could...be in your lap. I'd like to be close to you for this."

"Of course, Fjord. Of course I'll hold you."

After so long, so full, it felt uncomfortable to be empty, and it was more difficult that Fjord thought it would be to remain relaxed as Caduceus took a moment to wipe off his fingers. The tell tale sound of the glass vial had Fjord nearly clenching on reflex, but he distracted himself by watching as Caduceus poured a generous amount into his palm and began to slick himself up. Now that his vision wasn't obscured, Fjord managed to get a decent look at Caduceus' length. It bobbed gently against his stomach when untouched, with a slight curve, and the head was more tapered than Fjord's, and several ridges surrounded the shaft at varying distances, following a natural if not entirely uniform pattern. The top two flared beading a clear fluid of their own as Caduceus' hand passed over them and heat coiled tightly in Fjord's abdomen in anticipation.

Another moment passed, where Caduceus, seemingly satisfied, wiped his hands once more before leaning over Fjord with deep look, and pressing a kiss to his cheek. Large hands gripped at his hips, pulling up further up Caduceus' lap where Fjord had already been propped, then drawing his legs down to either side of Caduceus' waist.

"Sit up."

Shakily, Fjord complied. Caduceus took his hands as he did, helping pull him to sitting. With his feet flat on the ground it was easier, but Fjord still sagged limply, leaning check to cheek with Caduceus, when he passed Fjord arms over his own shoulders in a loose embrace.

Caduceus hands found his hips again, a little less gently than before. Everything slowed then. The shaven side of Caduceus head was peach soft beneath Fjord's palm and he turned his head in just enough. Time didn't stop, between the moment when Caduceus lifted Fjord by his hips as though he were weightless, and the whisper Fjord could no longer contain, but it felt like it did.

Butterfly wings on the softest drifting breeze, were his words.

"I love you, Caduceus."

Inertia and gravity demanded that the action already in motion be completed. Caduceus did not - could not - hold him infinitely hovering above the precipice. As the words left his lips, Fjord felt the blunt press of Caduceus' cock slip against him, not quite perfectly aligned. One hand strayed from his hip to correct it, and the rest was the natural, slow friction as Caduceus lowered Fjord down onto his cock, inch for inch, the ridges catching gently as he passed each. Of course, it all happened within the same space of time it took for him to confess, for his tongue, loose with endorphins, to betray him completely.

Which meant that the soft "Oh", that reached Fjord's ears could have just as easily been in reaction to the intense, tight heat of their conjuncture, as it may have been a response to his confession. For all he knew, Caduceus might not even have heard him at all.

Fully seated, flush in Caduceus' lap, Fjord's ruminations were temporarily waylaid by the impossible fullness, the depth, the delicious burn of his muscles, and if he was limp before, now he was dead in Caduceus' arms, pliant and overflowing with sensation and emotion both.

Slowly, tenderly, Caduceus's arms came around him, a hand pressed firmly on his shoulder, another grasping at the short hairs on the back of his neck, both pulling him tight and secure into Caduceus' warm embrace.

" _Fjord_..."

He drew back to see Caduceus, eyes heavily lidded, cheeks flush, more ruined than Fjord had even seen him before, trademark composure lost. He wet his lips, and then, leaned his head in until their foreheads were touching, holding one another up.

" _Fjord_." The ache in his voice was unmistakable.

He'd heard.

"I do. I am. In love with you. Bad timing." They were so close, they were sharing breath. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." Caduceus' voice wavered. "I love you, too."

Joy burst in Fjord's heart, along with relief. The wind whipped a little more exuberantly around them. This time, when they kissed, the passion was languid, searing. Abortive, in their current position, Caduceus' hips jolted up, jostling Fjord's balance. The kiss, and the embrace broke at once, but their foreheads remained pressed together, their lips just barely brushing. Though Fjord kept his arms around Caduceus for stability, Caduceus' hands drifted back once more to their default position - maybe, hopefully, Fjord thought, there'd be the slightest bruises there in the morning.

When Caduceus lifted Fjord nearly off the cock in his ass, before pulling him back down, a little more sharply than Fjord expected, all thought ceased, existence boiled down to the dragging friction within him, the constant press of their sweat slicked skin, the puffs of exerted breath over his cheek, their small sounds mingling in the quiet and solitude.

The slow, careful pattern gradually increased as Caduceus' infamous patience wore thin, his hips stuttering up to meet Fjord's each time he drew Fjord back down to meet them. Fjord too, helped as much as he could to lift himself, even as they both strove to remain as melded together, as one as possible in the silver haze of their joining, their newfound elation at shared hearts and share bodies together as one.

The nature of their position, the rocking motion, the height difference, meant that for each kiss Caduceus pressed worshipfully to Fjord's lips, as soon as he was moved again - a freeing thought, that it was Caduceus who determined the pace, the strength of each thrust, the angle, and the precise way it would strike him - their kiss inevitably broke. Never quite proper, not always directly on the lips, but it didn't matter; the reverence with which Caduceus lavished his attention, as promised, everywhere, was enough to make up for the haphazard regularity of their kisses, until they were merely breathing together, and not really kissing at all.

Abruptly, in an uncharacteristic display, Caduceus huffed a bit, mumbling something, and bent back a bit, taking Fjord with him, who jolted more firmly into his lap as they turned mid motion, a little precariously. The next moment, Caduceus was leaning forward, not back, his arms cradling Fjord as he found himself pillowed by the pile of their clothing mere seconds before Caduceus, unconstrained finally, by the new position, jarringly, perfectly, thrust into Fjord, pushing him back a little with the force of it, over the gossamer fabric of what he thought might have been Caduceus's shirt.

Between a ruined kiss and a moan, Caduceus fixed their gazes together. "Okay?"

"Perfect."

The angle was deeper, which Fjord hadn't thought possible. He was sure, if he gave up his hold on Caduceus' shoulders and slipped his hand between them, beneath where his own cock lay, almost painfully erect, he might feel the swell, the fullness, beneath his hand, of Caduceus within him. Groaning at the mere thought along, Fjord pitched his hips up to meet Caduceus' as he pistoned in and out, ridges providing an unpredictable pattern of sensation each time.

Their movements were growing increasingly erratic, their passion's peak nearing. Ever since the confession, Caduceus' steady stream of words had seemingly dried up, replaced by kisses and moans, but there had been a purpose in what they were doing, Fjord vaguely recalled. Things were hazy and bright, especially when Caduceus managed to catch into him at just the right angle, but the warmth of the wind had not dissipated.

"Mother," Fjord managed shakily, and Caduceus, surprised, stuttered and halted half a moment to look at Fjord with wonderment, before a hitch of Fjord's hips urged him back on."I am o-open. I am vuln-nerable. I love Cad- Caduceus. I welcome him within my-" A moan escaped him. "-body, within my heart. Accept...our...offering...of life."

Reminded, perhaps, of their initial purpose by the words, Caduceus pace grew punishing, Fjord only too happy to try and meet him, thrust for thrust, keyed up as he was. But Caduceus seemed determined, reaching between them to stroke fervently, though not harshly at Fjord's cock, working him ever fast towards completion.

"Accept the seed of our bodies," Caduceus ground out, presumably completing the ritual. "As we plant love within one another on this Zenith night."

Between the last few deep thrusts and the swipe of Caduceus' thumb over his cock's swollen and beading head, Fjord came. It was electric throughout his body, muscles rippling in contraction as Caduceus worked him through it, hips stuttering three, four, five more times before he stilled and warmth pooled deep within Fjord. They both fell boneless and limp into a heap on the clothes, still joined, breathing heavily, but sated and complete. And, as Fjord had hoped, pleasantly sore.  
  
A feather soft kiss found his temple, as Caduceus nuzzled against him. "That was..."

"Mhmm." Fjord hadn't the energy for words. Not yet.

"You were incredible."

Instead of replying, Fjord craned his head back, and smiled gently, blinking against the light of the moon. "Kiss me."

A genuine grin, large and crooked and languid, bloomed on Caduceus face. "My pleasure."

As delicate and tender as the last fifty times, Caduceus lips found his. And when they parted once more, and Caduceus looked down on him with that open, entreating gaze, Fjord felt his heart was fit to burst.

"Love me?" Why had he ever held the words back, when they had been so wholeheartedly reciprocated, when the truth of Caduceus' feeling for him had been there in his eyes the whole time?

"Always," Caduceus replied, with the same simple earnestness he'd always had before. And he leaned in to kiss Fjord again, there, beneath the moonlight, against the backdrop of the vast and unending sea.

**Author's Note:**

> N-now with fanart? Holy shit! Thank you! NSFW https://mobile.twitter.com/nekosd_ad/status/1298389877130530817


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